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Monday Morning writing

Morning Routine – Inspiration and Motivation

January 8, 2018
morning routine

My morning routine at the moment looks like a grumpy ball of yarn rolling around the house, bumping into things in the dark and grumbling. On good mornings, when my alarm goes off at 5:30am, I’ll get up and turn on the coffee before going back to sleep for fifteen minutes. On bad mornings, I’ll get up and bring my alarm back into bed with me to sleep for an extra thirty to forty five minutes.

I’ve heard that the best way to motivate yourself to get up early in the morning is to focus on why you want to be up earlier. So, in addition to hoping I feel less rushed in the mornings, what I really want to accomplish before going to work each day is writing.

morning routine

my cat’s morning routine is the ideal one, I think.

To get some inspiration, I took a look at a few routines from famous writers. Most writers advocate for discipline in craft, usually in the form of writing every single day, and almost of all of those writers write in the morning, when the light is fresh and the day is new. What I found most interesting from reading this list though was the strong sense of routine involved in their process; it’s just as much about the motions involved in writing this way as it is sitting down at the exact same time each morning to put words on paper.

Honestly, I find the idea of writing every single day daunting, in the same way that I find exercising every day to be an insurmountable goal. What about Cons? Vacations? Or, as I have been for the past couple of weeks, being so sick that concentrating is only happening for a few hours a day? I know these formidable writers had no issue breaking for these sorts of things, but it’s precisely those quantities that make it difficult for me to stick to an every day writing routine. (It’s the same reason I can’t stick to using a normal planner, really. I have to give myself permission to deviate or I feel like an absolute failure.)

So here’s what I’m proposing as a starting goal: three days a week, I will get up early enough to get writing done. Two days a week, I’ll do yoga during that time instead. (Murakami says, “Physical strength is a necessary as artistic sensitivity,” in terms of writing a long-term project.) On the weekends, I am giving myself permission to deviate as necessary. I’d love to get up on Saturday and write and do yoga, but it’s also just as likely that I’ll get up and drink coffee on my front porch. And that is okay.

Here’s to the next step in the good morning process, everyone! Hurrah for a morning routine!

Monday Morning

Good Morning – 2018 New Year’s Resolution

January 1, 2018
good morning

Good morning, everyone! The clean slate of the new year usually makes me feel anxious, partly because all the planning in the world won’t help me know what’s coming ahead. In the last couple of years, I’ve tried to embrace that unknown future as though it is filled with possibility and opportunity. I’m hoping I can stick with that little bit of optimism as 2018 begins because it was difficult to maintain through the crazy things happening in 2017.

There are things I learned the hard way this year–like avoiding the news until after I’ve had coffee (because there is always something going so wrong that I think the world is going to fall apart) and not checking my work email after I get home. There are things I learned unexpectedly–like taking a chance to do something I love, no matter the time commitment, is always worth it. There are things others have seen in me this year that surprised me, like being told my fashion sense is “trendy” or people suddenly deciding my voice is lovely or realizing how much I procrastinate on accomplishing things that scare me.

wicked

When I was in NYC last January, I saw Wicked by myself. I definitely recommend it.

I took a lot of crazy chances in 2017. I auditioned for a play for the first time in a decade; I auditioned for The Voice. I went on several road trips by myself, like a trip to Austin, Texas, in May or my trip to Nashville, Tennessee, for Con of Thrones. I went on a few dates. I bought a car. I moved into a 300-square-foot house. I walked through NYC by myself to see a Broadway play.

So really, most of my current goals for 2018 involve keeping up the trend I’ve started without realizing it. I want to see more plays. I want to travel. I want to be okay when I fail auditions or get rejected by magazines/agents. I want to stop being surprised when people want to spend time with me. I want to be safe and comfortable in my own skin.

Usually, I have a habit each year I would like to cultivate, like how I wanted to start being more mindful about making healthy choices in 2016. These habits, once I create them, become things I don’t even have to think about, and then the next year I add on another. For 2018, I want to start waking up a little bit earlier… and not being so grumpy about it.

For those that have never had the pleasure (and trust me, be thankful), I am not a morning person by any stretch of the imagination. Talking to me before I’ve had coffee is a very unwise idea. And despite the fact that I’ve had the same job, the same work schedule, for nearly two years, it is still a battle to get up every morning. I find other people’s morning routines interesting and involved and inspiring, but my mornings mostly involve prying myself out of bed and yelling at my cat. I want that to change.

This year, I’m hoping to document my journey to reach a “good morning” state. I’ll be inviting friends and family to tell you about their magical routines, trying new habits, and generally trying to not be grumpy along the way. A new post will be live each Monday morning, and hopefully that will give us both something to look forward to as each week begins.

Happy New Year, everyone! I hope you’ll be back to check in on me (and hold me accountable) next week!

life music

Back to School – a playlist that motivates

August 29, 2017
school

schoolWhen I was in school, I spent my summers in marching band rehearsal or babysitting my little siblings, so it never occurred to me to be sad when school started again in August. By the time the first day of school came, I was exhausted and ready for a steady routine that involved more reading.

And even as I got older, this never really changed. It didn’t matter if I was in college or grad school, teaching at a university or at a community college; the start of a new school year always seems like the kick I need to make it through the year in one mostly-not-anxious piece.

So as the date to start classes got closer and closer, I thought about the kind of communication I wanted to teach my students. I only have a few this semester, so I should have the opportunity to teach them all at their level and really help them move forward in their college careers. It’s refreshing and intimidating.

I ask my students occasionally what they think makes a good teacher. It’s not because I look for words of affirmation (because I am constantly trying to improve my syllabus and teaching methods so I know I have a lot of room for improvement). If they know the answer off the top of their heads, then they have had a good teacher in the past. They know this education thing is hard work but that there are some people who care how they go about it.

So school has started, probably a few weeks ago if you’re in the public school system, but it’s only just beginning for college students. Now, more than ever, they know the debt and cost at stake, and they are still showing up for class to try and better themselves.

I made this playlist as a reminder to move forward, but honor the past. It’s best to accept my mistakes and play up my strengths. I am an imperfect person, for sure, but I am one who continues to learn new things and continues to try. I hope this inspires you to do the same.

life

The Anatomy of a Lake House

August 22, 2017

lake houseFor the past couple years, I spend a few weekends a year in this lovely lake house in Hot Springs, Arkansas. I spend a few days watching their two beagles (who you can spy in my Instagram feed from time to time) and enjoying all the open air. It’s a fairly small house, with three bedrooms, two bathrooms, and a wall of windows facing the gorgeous view of the lake. Both the porch and the deck have several little spots for you to drink coffee and enjoy the quiet morning air.

The drive to the lake house is quiet; there are trees and open fields, and if I am driving in the morning I often run across a couple families of deer. As I drive further from the downtown parts of the city, the air around me seems calmer. I know at the end of this drive, there is a lake view waiting for me, as well as two adorable beagles who tend to bark at just about everything.

In the lake house itself, I love the open feeling, the wood accents, the white cabinets and clever use of color. The little accents in this house change just a little bit every time I am there, but it always feels organic to the space and classic to their style. They use similar frames in every room, even if the photos are quite different in style. They use wood/brown and white as a base, mirroring the view of the trees and sky outside the windows. It’s filled with light during the day, and it’s so comfortable.

lake houseIn particular, I love the set up in the entry way of their lake house, so I’m going to linger on that for a second. When I first walk in the door, I’m astounded by the amount of light pouring into the space. I like the touches of dark wood to keep the space feeling friendly, and I love the antique phone and gold mirror for the classic style they display. There are levels being played with on this table, with the tall lamp and the short bowl where keys gather. The pictures above the storage are placed at different heights to add an air of casual comfort, and the photos themselves are of family to add a personal touch. You know, as soon as you walk in, exactly the kind of people you are there to visit. They are clean, casual, warm people, and so is their home.

For me, even a visit to their home reminds me of the kind of life I want to lead–quiet and warm and open, with immense affection around every corner. Lake view or not, I think every house should have these elements to help create a home.

life writing

On Jennas, werewolves, and cookies

August 12, 2017

otherwise known as living a creative life with fear and anxiety

creative life

This is pretty close to every day me.

Things have been quiet on the blog front for quite some time, ironic because when it was called quiet in the grasp I could never seem to shut up. But then a funny thing happened–I started putting all this pressure on myself to live a life I’d always planned.

I’m pretty sure we all hit 25 or 30 (or whatever big milestone freaks you out) and realize that life is more complicated, more out of control than you ever anticipated. I had no way of knowing that the magazines I was planning to edit would be a very elite business by the time I graduated, and I had no way of knowing how much continued rejection would beat me down and make me doubt my own creative ideas. I had no control over the terrible economy or the awful politics or how either of those things would effect my every day life and dreams.

Stability is something I have always searched for, but I am hopeless about finding it or keeping it. In fact, if things aren’t changing on a fairly regular basis, I get massive anxiety attacks and fear that everything in my life will be exactly the same forever.

So, I’m trying to get back to some of my roots. I want to remember what used to wake me up early in the morning to jot down notes for a novel idea or why I used to stay up late singing a new song. I have been writing stories since I was about 12, singing since I was 5, and yet now that I have spent most of my life loving these things they are somehow getting more difficult, filled with more pressure and expectations.

In an effort to get back some of the me I miss, I am going to start writing here more often, maybe make an occasional video. I am going to sing and write more, without the pressure of knowing if those efforts will ever see the light the day. I am going to make plans for creative projects, set deadlines, but not necessarily make any grand, ambitious plans.

I hope you’ll be along for the ride, or at the very least, I hope that you remember what it is that makes you feel like you. Keep it, or fight to get it back.

P.S. I know the title of this blog post makes very little sense, but trust me when I tell you that cookies, my friend Jenna, weird dreams about werewolves, and the ever-wonderful Mudha are a big part in me trying to get past this fear of creativity. Also, I just finished reading Big Magic by Elizabeth Gilbert, and so I’ve been thinking about this for awhile now.